Teenage Lightning

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vicemag:

This Is What Developing Acute Schizophrenia Feels Like
A year ago this winter, I began to not recognize myself. 
Sleep was the first thing to change. Progressively, over the course of about two weeks, I began struggling to drift off. As a 24-year-old man with a good supply of hash, this had never been a problem before. It was so odd. Seemingly out of the blue, I’d get into bed at night and not be able to shut off my brain. Thoughts would grow tendrils and loop onto other thoughts, tangling together like a big wall of ivy. Some nights, I’d pull the covers over my head, grab my face hard in my hands, and whisper, “Shut. The. Fuck. Up.”
Eventually I would be able to get to sleep, but I’d wake up feeling peculiar, like I had forgotten to do or tell someone something. Hunger wasn’t as aggressive as it usually was during this time, either. Normally I bolt downstairs to pour a heaping bowl of Frosted Flakes the second my eyes open. Instead, I woke each morning with a sick, creeping feeling in my gut. Still, I carried on as normal, thinking I’d just lay off the hash for a bit. That was probably it. I wasn’t panicked. 
I carried on my work at a local wine shop and tried to push what was happening during the night to the back of my mind. I got through the days OK, if slightly bleary-eyed—but looking back now I can see that I had started to struggle with simple conversations. 
If my boss told me to check a delivery, it’d take me a few seconds to process what he was saying, like two or three people had said it at the same time and I couldn’t make out the clear instruction. Looking at morning delivery slips and trying to make sense of them in my head was like trying to make out a tree in the fog—possible, but hard.
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vicemag:

This Is What Developing Acute Schizophrenia Feels Like

A year ago this winter, I began to not recognize myself. 

Sleep was the first thing to change. Progressively, over the course of about two weeks, I began struggling to drift off. As a 24-year-old man with a good supply of hash, this had never been a problem before. It was so odd. Seemingly out of the blue, I’d get into bed at night and not be able to shut off my brain. Thoughts would grow tendrils and loop onto other thoughts, tangling together like a big wall of ivy. Some nights, I’d pull the covers over my head, grab my face hard in my hands, and whisper, “Shut. The. Fuck. Up.”

Eventually I would be able to get to sleep, but I’d wake up feeling peculiar, like I had forgotten to do or tell someone something. Hunger wasn’t as aggressive as it usually was during this time, either. Normally I bolt downstairs to pour a heaping bowl of Frosted Flakes the second my eyes open. Instead, I woke each morning with a sick, creeping feeling in my gut. Still, I carried on as normal, thinking I’d just lay off the hash for a bit. That was probably it. I wasn’t panicked. 

I carried on my work at a local wine shop and tried to push what was happening during the night to the back of my mind. I got through the days OK, if slightly bleary-eyed—but looking back now I can see that I had started to struggle with simple conversations. 

If my boss told me to check a delivery, it’d take me a few seconds to process what he was saying, like two or three people had said it at the same time and I couldn’t make out the clear instruction. Looking at morning delivery slips and trying to make sense of them in my head was like trying to make out a tree in the fog—possible, but hard.

Continue

— 4 days ago with 3403 notes
laurencephilomene:

laurencephilomene-photo:

Edwin bathing in pepto bismol (pink study #2) - by Laurence Philomene

prepping images for the coven show right now :)

laurencephilomene:

laurencephilomene-photo:

Edwin bathing in pepto bismol (pink study #2) - by Laurence Philomene

prepping images for the coven show right now :)

(Source: laurencephilomene.com)

— 4 days ago with 482 notes

prayforprada:

digg:

Skipping a rock over a frozen pond makes the coolest noise.

stick around for the surprise ending

this was a wild ride from start to finish

The delight

(via toolers)

— 4 days ago with 273426 notes
beauty-student:

I just love this, it’s quite simply stunning. Everything just works and I love the concept of the double eyebrow. Gorgeous colour palette.

beauty-student:

I just love this, it’s quite simply stunning. Everything just works and I love the concept of the double eyebrow. Gorgeous colour palette.

(via powderdoom)

— 4 days ago with 14175 notes
Doll Hospital →

meyllenpage:

Hey! I contributed some writing to this really awesome journal about mental health that also features people like Tavi Gevinson, Latoya Peterson, Esme Wang, Kate Zambreno, Kristina Wong, and Diamond J Sharp.

If you can contribute to help get it made, that would be super amazing!

(via brujacore)

— 4 days ago with 38 notes